How to start a Christmas day with a 3-yr-old

Christmas morning, 2012, about 8am - way too early to be awake after staying up 'til 3am wrapping presents.

I woke with a start.  Charlie was screaming in pain.  He came in and said, "My nose hurss! [hurts]"
"What happened?" I asked with concern, "Did you pick your nose?"
"Yeah, [pause] no.  I puh ih in dere."
Growing alarmed now, I asked, "Put WHAT in there?"
"I puh ih in dere.  In my nose."
"What?  WHAT in your nose? Is it food?" I asked hopefully.
"Yeah.  Ess food."  He said, but didn't sound too sure.
"It's food?  Is it candy, or is it a lego?"  (Please, PLEASE do not be a lego!!)
"No!  Nah a weh-go.  Ess tan-ee"
(Phew!) "What kind of candy?  Is it a round candy?"  The boys had been playing with some hard round candies yesterday that were slightly smaller than a pea. 
"Yeah.  Iss roun tan-ee"
"Okay.  Okay (breathing again).  Blow your nose and get it out."
He sniffs... IN.
"No, no!  Blow out, like this"  I make a show of snorting out.  "Oh dangit!  He's making it worse!" I think.
He sniffs again.  I reach for his nose to plug the clear nostril, and he screams at me and runs away to his room.

I flop back on the bed and mutter to Mike, "Great.  GREAT!  He would have to put something up his nose the one day that the doctor and Instacare are not available.  Our only option if we can't get this out is the ER."
Mike turns over and mumbles that it will be fine; it's candy.  It will melt.  How the heck can he be so calm??  My baby might permanently damage his lungs, and worse, we might have to go to the ER and fork out $150 just to hear: Oh, it's nothing.  If it was candy it probably just melted.
"I'm not sure of that!  It could be something else... a bead maybe!  And he's sniffing!  What if he aspirates it into his lungs?" I mildly exploded. [Not sure if that was the correct medical term, but that was the word I thought of: aspirates.]

My panic was growing when I heard Charlie cry out again.  I jumped up and rushed to his room.  "Iss owt, Mah-Mah," he said with the remnants of a sniffle from crying.
Cautious relief begins flooding my system, but I am still skeptical.  "Where is it?" I asked.
"Oveh dere." he said pointing at a blanket on the floor.
"Over there?  Where??  Go get it!"
He scrambles over to the blanket and picks something up, brings it back to me and deposits a sticky, and now slightly smaller round piece of candy.
The full relief takes over.  I admonish him to NEVER put candy, or anything else, in his nose ever, ever AGAIN.

He agrees.  (Thank heavens... but I'll believe it when I don't ever see it again...)

Well... what great adrenaline rush to start the day off.
Merry Christmas to me. 

Anyone else have an amazing Christmas morning... that didn't go exactly as planned?

ADHD

Excuse me, I need to climb up onto my soapbox for a moment.

There.

Now for all of you within the blog reading zone... please listen (read) up!

I have ADHD. I have had it my whole life. When I was little my parents and teachers didn't quite know what to do with me.

Teachers:

"She won't stay in her seat"

"She talks out of turn"

"She constantly interrupts"

"She raises her hand, but blurts things out before she is called on"

"She doesn't get her work done"

"She doesn't listen to directions"

Parents:

"Why don't you answer when I call your name?"

"Why won't you hold still?"

"Why are you just sitting there staring off into space? You're supposed to be doing X!"

"How many times do I have to tell you to do the same things?  Do I have to make you a list?"

That last sentence was always dripping with sarcasm. I always replied with an emphatic "YES!" because I knew that I would not remember everything I was asked to do - or sometimes that I'd even been asked to do it.

HELP! I’m flying with small children!

I'm a veteran flier. My husband works for Southwest Airlines, so we fly a LOT. I think we average 12 or more trips per year. (He averages many, many more)

I have 4 boys ages 11, 8, 4, & 2, and most of the time I travel with them ALL BY MYSELF. That’s right, my husband is already in another city, so he does not help at all. My 2 oldest boys sit in the other rows, so I get to deal with 2 & 4 on my own. Yay.

It’s not so bad though if you take some steps to prepare.

Here are the things that help me when we fly:

Pillow & blanket. Only for long flights, but they can't help it. Lower oxygen & boredom means if you make 'em comfy enough they'll zonk. I always at least take blankets for the younger two on EVERY flight.

BENADRYL! Benadryl is completely safe. My pediatrician is the one who told me to do this. Not kidding. This IS the drug that's in Tylenol PM. Completely safe & non-addictive. Be sure you check with the doc or pharmacist for the correct dose for their respective weights. You may want to pre-test this though – because a very small percentage of children (including my 2^nd son) go the opposite way and get hyper when given Benadryl. We learned this at a bad time. On a plane. Try it out near bedtime before you have to go. Trust me. And once they're out - you go to sleep too; take your own dose of benadryl if you need to. :D

HEALTHY snacks. The airlines will give you junk. It's fun at first, but then you want REAL food. And not the crap they dole out. Fruit is always good. My kids LOVE grapes & oranges. Peanut butter sandwiches taste heavenly when you’re starving. Granola bars & real fruit leather work wonders too.

Something to help their eardrums pop:

Drink: No, you can’t bring juice boxes through security anymore. Dangit!! You can bring juice or formula in a bottle, but my kids are past that. So, bring sippies & Sports bottles and fill them with water after you get through security. If you don’t trust the drinking fountain you can go to any of the restaurants & get water from the soda machine. Sippies are also invaluable for keeping the drink the little one gets on the plane contained. The lid & straw they provide always just turn into toys in the hands of my kids.

Something chewy: For the older boys gum works great. But for the little ones? Not so much. So we bring other chewy things. Swedish fish, star burst, taffy, fruit snacks… And they know these are ONLY doled out during take-off, and more importantly during the descent. When I feel my ears starting to pop it’s time to get the snacks back out.

Play the yawning game: It’s easy. I yawn, you yawn. Who can do the biggest yawn?

Sleep: Ah yes, back to the pillow & blanket and Benadryl. The nice thing is that if they’re asleep during descent their ears tend to work it out on their own.

Decongestant (last resort): This one is tricky. It’s a controlled substance (kinda), and the little ones can NOT take the pills. If there is any reason their ears are not popping (like a cold – or stuffy nose – or crying), this is the thing that will bring relief. And trust me, an ear that won’t pop hurts a LOT. I’ve been there. I can sympathize with the poor babies to whom this happens. I ALWAYS bring this stuff. Yes, it’s medicine so you can carry it on even if it’s more than 3 oz.

*warning* This causes most kids to become hyper. So I tend to avoid this one unless I know they REALLY need it and we’ve exhausted the other options. Except in the case of a cold – then it’s absolutely mandatory first. I hate traveling when the kids are sick, so if I know they have a cold when we’re are going I try to reschedule. It’s just not worth it! This is more for when they’ve caught the cold there & you need help coming back.
Oh, and the kids that get hyper with Benadryl will often be the same ones who don’t get hyper when they take a decongestant – and will conk out instead. Yay!

But what to do when they’re awake?

Well, that’s when you break out the entertainment.

Bring your own movie player: DVD player, ipad, laptop, tablet… whatever you have that can play movies. I’ve found for the 2 & 4-yr-olds that they prefer their favorites be with them. The older kids like new ones. Redbox is AWESOME for that (domestically). Rent it at home, return it in the city you visit. Don’t forget the headphones, and the splitter so they can BOTH hear the movie. If the airline provides movies you may still want your own, but if you do want to watch theirs pick up your own headphones and adapter at home. They’re cheap, and then you don’t have to pay every time to use them!

Again, test run is important. Nothing worse than getting on the airplane and finding one of the headphones broken, the splitter not working, the DVD player not playing, and the batteries dying only one hour into the flight. Yes, all those things have happened to me. Actually, all of them happened on the last flight I took with my kids. You’d think I would know better. Apparently not.

Other Electronic toys: My kids like their Nintendo DS’s. Even the 4-yr-old is enamored of this one. Or let them play with a PSP. iTouches and iPhones (in airplane mode) are great for the little ones. Not only do they play videos, but there are lots of free apps that are fun for them to mess around with. Again, if there is sound, plug in the headphones.

Take them for a walk: As soon as the fasten seatbelt light is off, get up and walk the aisles a bit. Be sure to remind the little ones not to touch the other passengers, or walking time is over. This helps them blow off a little steam, and with luck tires them back out. It helps YOUR circulation as well.

Take them to the bathroom: I know, it’s a little gross, but it’s a distraction. And with all the liquids they’ll be taking in (and they DO need them – part of “jetlag” is dehydration) they’ll need to go more often anyway.

Books: Favorites, or something new. Either way, kids love a good story. And when they’re little they often like hearing the same one over and over and over and … bring a healthy dose of patience for this one. Coloring books are also a great diversion in this category too if you have one that likes to color. Mine don’t. (dangit)

Treats: What happened to healthy snacks? Those are great, but sometimes it takes chocolate to calm the kids. I know, bribery is not the best thing in parenting, but in a confined space when you’ve tried everything else it may be a lifesaver. And to tell the truth, I like having a treat! (Peanuts do NOT count as a treat)

Toys: Again, favorites are good here. Be careful of the small ones. They’re hard to find when dropped, especially when the plane tilts to go up or down and the small car rolls all the way to the back of the plane – or at least 10 rows behind you. That was NOT good. Backup toys are good.

Surprises: It doesn’t have to be anything big – really. The trick is to wrap it like a present. A snack, a new book (or old), something from a dollar store – all are good.

Don’t forget yourself!

Make sure you bring entertainment, healthy snacks, treats & drink container for you too! And on a long flight pillow & blanket for you as well. Planes are only pressurized to 8000 ft, and for most of us that is far too little oxygen. If you tend to get altitude sickness like I do (light-headed, headache, nausea) a little caffeine can go a long way. I don’t like colas, so I usually drink a Mountain Dew before I go. A quarter pill of Vivarin would do the same thing though. Sleep also helps kill the altitude sickness.

Any other tips or questions? Please comment!

listen, listen...

Our new Relief Society president in her lesson on Sunday said that we may not always know when we are being prompted by the Holy Ghost. I suppose that may be true. I do know that with practice it becomes easier to know when you are being prompted. I've learned to discern when I am being prompted, mostly through having been prompted and not following the direction given. Then having to clean up or otherwise rectify a situation that wouldn't have happened if I had listened. Almost always after I am reminded that I was told, but not in a na-na-na-na-na told you so kind of way, more like: I'm so sorry this happened honey; I tried to protect you!
And then I promise for the umpteenth time that I will listen better next time. It's hard though, because even though I recognize it as a prompting I am often a willful little stinker. What I am being asked to do is often inconvienient, and not what I had planned, so I don't want to! So often I get promptings when I am running about, trying to get things together or put away in preparation for the next thing or leaving.


So, now for the latest. Don't worry, this is a good story. I listened this time.

Spring/summer is finally here. So it is pollen season! Yay. not.
Michael and I are both fighting the itchy, runny eyes & noses. We like to use the eye drops and nasal mist. They work well, without us getting drowsy. On Monday we'd had a particularly rough day, and had both been coughing the night before. This was a new one for me and him, and I wondered what we could do to prevent a repeat that night. I pulled out the bottle of regular antihistamines. The kind that DO make you drowsy. I hesitated. I don't like being drowsy, and I had so much to do tomorrow! I began to put them back without taking one, but then the spirit whispered to me that I should take one, and if I did I would be able to get enough rest, and everything would be ok. "I won't fall asleep when I drive?" I questioned. I could almost feel a tinge of laughter when I was reminded that he'd already said everything would be ok. I was promised I wouldn't feel tired when I drove. So that fear aside I called Michael in and we each took an antihistamine.

So on Tuesday it was evident we both slept better for it too. So I figured that was why I was told to take it, right? Good enough for me. I was glad I had listened, and thanked Heavenly Father for His guidance.

I trundled the kids off to the library that afternoon after Charlie's nap. Nathaniel fell asleep on the way, so I had to wake him to go in. Needless to say, he was not the most cooperative little guy. He pulled his "I'm not happy with you, so I'm going to run away" trick far too many times. But I told him only one book, then I had agreed to two. So when he ran away when I said no to the third, I took back the second as well.

And then I was stupid enough to continue on to Target! I wanted to get a shower curtain for Michael's recently finished shower. He was SO excited to start using his own bathroom! Nathaniel made a bee-line for the candy right as we walked in the door. He grabbed his favorite chewy jolly ranchers and refused to let me take them to put in the cart. So I put him in the cart with them. He then began surreptciously eating them. (I don't know if that was before or after the free cookie from the bakery) By the time I found out half the box was gone. And then he didn't want those, he wanted a new candy bar! No.
So we took our stuff and went to check out. As we neared the checkout Nathaniel spied a 4-pack box of muffins, and asked if we could have them. I knew he was hungry so I told him no muffins today, but I will take you home and get you dinner right away. I started loading our stuff onto the belt and then heard gasps and some stifled giggles behind me. Nathaniel had opened a box of muffins and taken a huge bite. The giggles had been from the other female shoppers. "I guess we're getting muffins after all," I said with a bit of exasperation. I glanced at the box before I set it with the other items to be purchased. "Cranberry orange" I saw. "Ok," I thought, "at least it is a flavor I like. I wonder if the other kids will eat any of them?"
When we got out to the car I gave Nathaniel the rest of his pre-bitten muffin. Then I grabbed one too and took a bite.
It tasted funny. I looked again at the label. Cranberry orange WALNUT muffins.
CRAP.
I'm allergic to nuts. I could feel an edge of panic and dismay rising up in me. What should I do now? Could I hurry home fast enough to get some medicine, or would that be too late? Should I go back in and buy some so I can take one right away? I cringed. I dreaded the idea of going back into the store with the kids now - they'd all just been buckled in and opened their promised treats for being good. What was I going to do??
And then I got a wonderful feeling of peace wash over me. "You took an antihistamine last night," the spirit reminded me. And suddenly I could see that THIS was the reason I had done so! With the antihistamine already in my system the nuts would not have a chance to make me sick. I was so relieved, and so very grateful I had listened.

Then today, not so much.
I had lain down with the baby to get him to go to sleep. It worked. On both of us. Nathaniel sought me out, and asked me to make him some chocolate milk. The spirit warned me that I should get up and get it for him NOW, but I balked. I was still tired, and would get up in a minute. I told Nathaniel I would come in the kitchen in a moment. And then I fell back asleep. (I didn't mean to!) When I woke a little later and came into the kitchen there was chocolate powder everywhere.

So, I'm not so good at listening yet. I guess that's not true. I hear, but I don't obey well enough yet. Perhaps that is what I should be promising more of: obedience.

Change of direction... and LISTEN!!

First change:

I had been planning a vacation to see my brother & his family (mostly his wife - we are best of friends) for over a year. Then my friend decided to get married that weekend. So we postponed the trip - just long enough that we missed the balloon festival that we had planned to see while we were in Albuquerque.

Second change:

My trip plans were to go from Albuquerque (brother's house) to Portland, to Spokane so we could drive down to Mike's dad's house in Pendleton. The second day we were in Portland while we were at the Children's museum (wonderful place, be sure to go there if you're ever in Portland with small children) Josh developed a fever - and started tossing his cookies. I wouldn't have worried too much about that, but he also wouldn't eat. This is a sure sign in Josh that he is very sick.

So we took the 45 minute train ride back to the hotel. I had to wait for Mike to finish working and come back so I could get Josh some ibuprofen from the store.

I gave it to him, and waited. His fever came down only marginally. It was really really high. It was so high that I was pretty sure I could cook an egg on him. He was bright red - literally. I knew that it's usually a bacterial infection that causes such high fevers that ibuprofen can only barely dent. And we were more than 500 miles from home. I would have to take a plane to get him home... and if it was an ear infection it would be torture for him. Then I thought maybe it was just food poisoning, and maybe it would be out of his system by tomorrow afternoon. I got the strongest impression from the Holy Ghost that I needed to get him back to Salt Lake ASAP.

So I asked Mike what flights we could take the next day - without any stops. There were 2 choices: 6:45am, and 5:55 at night. I thought maybe it would be ok to let Josh rest in the hotel as long as possible and just take that evening flight. That way Mike could still take the kids swimming this night and they wouldn't be overly tired. So while Mike took the other kids swimming I stayed with the sleeping Josh and Charlie. I had thought I'd read or watch TV while my boys swam, but I felt compelled to start packing - just in case.

When Mike came back we talked about our options - splitting up the family to still have him see his dad - taking morning/evening flight - which kids I would take/leave to go with him. I felt so very unsettled, and I wasn't sure why. By the time we finished talking and decided that I would wait and see, it was quite late.

After Mike had gone to sleep I got the impression that it would NOT be ok to wait - I needed to take that morning flight. I was concerned that I wouldn't wake in time to get everyone packed in time - that I wouldn't wake in time. I went to sleep and then woke at 4am and felt Josh's forehead. His fever was still sky high and from when I gave him the medicine it should have been down at least a good bit. Then I felt like I was being catapulted out of Portland. I had to get up NOW and GO! - and I needed to take Mike with me. I was done questioning, so I finished packing quickly and woke everyone to go to the airport. Mike went along with it but grumbled a bit when I seemed to have everything in hand. Michael was causing problems because he was just so very tired (he kept laying down in random but bad places.) Indeed I wondered why I had had to bring them along. Then Josh tossed his cookies once more in the airport, and I had to rush him off to the bathroom. If Mike hadn't been there I wouldn't have been able to whisk Josh off so quickly. The boys all slept on the plane - no surprise there after getting them up at 5:15 - Michael had been shocked that other people were actually awake too!

Third change:

When we got home Thursday morning I decided rather than take him to the doc right away I'd let him rest and then wait and see if he would be ok. By 3:30 though I felt I needed to call the doc, despite feeling stupid doing so. Josh's only complaint was that his ears kinda hurt.
So we went. And the doc checked his ears. No, not them. So he checked his throat - because pain from the throat can radiate up there. No - didn't look bad. Did a strep test anyway. Negative. So we went home figuring that this was just a virus. I was perplexed as to why I had felt that impression to go if it were nothing. Perhaps just to confirm that I was doing all I could?

Fourth change:

Josh finally said he was feeling better Saturday afternoon. He ate soup and said he wanted to ride his bike. I told him no, of course. I wasn't about to let him do to much right away and relapse. I did need to go to the store - we were out of bread and milk. So I took him there. I got a pizza and we did a movie night. Josh even ate 2 slices, and it looked like his fever was all but gone. I thought, "Well since we're home and Josh seems to be doing better, I guess we'll go to church tomorrow."

I then got the impression that we should NOT go to church tomorrow. I thought that was a little weird. Why would the Holy Ghost tell me NOT to go to church? I brushed it off thinking I was probably just being a little lazy because I didn't want to drag 3 small kids to church, but after these trying few days perhaps I was entitled to a bit of laziness... just a bit.

Fast forward to Sunday morning - I woke to a phone call from Josh's doctor. He informed that Josh did in fact have strep and needed antibiotics right away. I was surprised because I had thought Josh was getting better, but I concurred. He told me I should watch for the symptoms in the other kids too. Then I felt I should tell him about Nathaniel's fever last night - I felt silly because I wasn't 100% sure it was even a fever - could've been just him running around & hot. The doc said he'd call in prescriptions for both.

Just now I held Nathaniel because he was being cranky.

He has a fever.

All I can say is, despite my doubts and reservations, I'm glad I listened.

Now I'm off to get some prescriptions - and some redbox movies. I hope I can keep them down long enough to actually get them better.

Wish me luck.

Here come the Rohde's... destroyer of worlds...

Here come the Rohde’s… destroyer of worlds…

Ok, so maybe not the WHOLE world... yet. But we're working on it, one house at a time!

We have a standing invitation to "camp out" whenever we like at a friend's house. He is a guy who's been like a second father to Mike. He has a big house, a big yard, and a fire pit in the back. There is also a stream nearby. It has all the things we look for in a campout spot, with bonuses like actual cooking facilities and beds for the babies... AND showers in the morning!

So we finally took him up on the offer this weekend. Then the weather forecast was for rain overnight. So we set up camp indoors.

That night Charlie and I stayed up late (as usual). I got thirsty and went out to the second fridge in the garage. I remembered that they usually have ice cream sandwiches in the freezer. I opened it and, sure enough, they were there, but it looked like they’d been there for a long time. A really, really long time. So… no. I grabbed a drink and went back to the kitchen with Charlie. About an hour after that, the power went off. No problem. I saw the emergency lanterns in the pantry and grabbed one of those. We played a bit longer, then finally got off to bed around 1am.

Next morning I wake to sounds in the kitchen and smells of pancakes. Our friend had cooked us breakfast! It was so sweet of him. I came up and got breakfast along with everyone else. It was wonderful, and when we’d all had enough our friend finally sat to eat and I began cleaning.

Since we were all distracted our oldest thought he’d sneak out to the garage for yet another soda. Mike caught him, and came back in aghast. He announced in any angry, upset tone that the freezer had been left open, and everything had thawed so “I hope you wanted to have meat tonight”. He said he was so sorry, because he was sure one of the kids must’ve done it. He then went out to get to work cleaning up the mess. M2 came with him, and then came back in to ask for a bucket. Then Mike came in to get a rag.

I thought back to last night and said to Mike that I felt it was probably me. I had been out to the garage after everyone else. It was most likely me that had done the damage. And it might've been ok, but the power had been out for HOURS last night.

Mike cleaned it up while I apologized. I was mentally tallying the damage costs I had caused. How much money would it take to replace all the meat and other stuff they’d had in that freezer? $50? $100? More?

I started to apologize to our friend, but he cut me off saying it was probably something that just fell keeping the freezer from shutting properly. He claimed some of that food was too old and needed to be thrown out anyway… plus he was getting his freezer cleaned out for free.

We stayed for lunch then packed up to go. Just before we left he asked us to come again. I wondered how he could say that with a straight face…

THEN THAT NIGHT...

From that adventure we went to another friend's house. We'd had them over a few times, and it was exciting to get to see their house. They'd made us a really nice dinner. N kept hitting, following, and otherwise annoying their son who is 7 and autistic. N was basically just driving him right to the edge. I had to keep grabbing N and apologizing to her son.

J tried to kill the fish and flood their house by banging on the fishtank. We foiled him in that.

Then, right as it was time to leave, I went where the adults were discussing expanding the driveway to tell them, and their son came out saying “He hit me!” I told him I’d be right there. I hurried in only to find that something had been spilled on the couch and NEW carpet . Root beer. Aw, Crap. I went back out to ask our friend for something to clean the couch and carpet with.

She came in gave me the stuff, and I was able to get it out of the carpet… but I’m not sure if I got it all out of the couch.

I wouldn’t be surprised if we don’t get invited back there either.

And after reading this I'm sure we won't be getting any invites anywhere. Ever.

Conversations with a 2-year-old

It's sad to think I won't be able to have many more conversations like these with Thaniel.

Because he's turning three soon.

So the latest one went like this:
Thaniel: (points at the laundry room) Ma-mah, es mess-ee.
Me: It's messy, huh?
Thaniel: 'es. Cee ih uhp!
Me: You want me to clean it up? (in an sad tone) Do I haaave to??
Thaniel: 'es.

So I guess I'd better get to work.
Right after I finish blogging.